FEMININE URGE OF BEING IN ATOXIC RELATIONSHIP WHILE IN CAMPUS.

"What do I want in Life?" At obvious times it seems very possible to achieve the goals you would want to attain so badly, be it Today or Tomorrow. But then many times, You come across the rocky mountains and you start getting exhausted even before starting to kick. What do I mean by this? As a young female being, I've had and yet to undergo different 'Life experiences'; both positive and Negative. So far I've observed keenly what's going on around me especially what's hoovering around this '21st century Generation' and to my conclusion, what I can say is we, as young people, are being pulled down in Relationships. I mean all kinds of relationships you know, be it a relationship between lovers, that with friends or colleagues or that with the minor and even the elders. But taking notes, it's not all relationships go the strange side, it's the Toxic relationships. Yes. I've heard a lot of heartbreaking stories about relationships being toxic and people getting depression from them and most of them are foretold by campus students (My friends included)

According to Dr. Lillian Glass, a California-based communication and Psychology expert who says she coined the term in the 1995 book 'Toxic people', defines a toxic relationship as "Any relationship (between people who) don't support each other where there's conflict and seeks to undermine the other where there's competition, disrespect and lack of cohesiveness. However, To my own understanding I'd say that a Toxic relationship is a forty out of a hundred percent doomed kind of relationship where both parties have no absolute freedom to express their thoughts and feelings towards one another rather than them getting hurt in the inside with the minor mistakes that keep on bumping into the relationship. In a healthy relationship, everything just kind of works. Sure, you might disagree from time to time or come upon bumbs on the road but you generally make decisions together, openly discussing any how to deal with obstacles that will lead to the downfall of the relationship. 

A study(Anertt 2000) states that many campus/ college students begin to embark in serious dating relating into adulthood. This leads to others especially girls, ending up in the toxic ones. These toxic relationships can also be defined as relationships where a partner controls aspects of the other partner’s life, and it can be abusive, in a psychological, physical or sexual way. The various subcategories of the toxic relationships are disrespect, inequity, lack of care, fear, lack of fulfillment, mental health issues, abuse, lack of boundaries. Also, as stated in Makepeace 1986, as cited in Follingstad, wright, Loud and Sebastian 1991, Girls in campuses or colleges tend to put up with the toxic relationships than to seek help. On the other hand, boys may be more likely to leave. These toxic relationships bring harm since they can make one end up depressed, isolated, angry and even be rationalized. (Byid, Bowder and Hayes 2009)

All in All, Toxic relationships are not doomed at All. Each party must have a deciding factor if they'd want to continue walking on eggshells or to start evaluating their relationship and be able to see and decide for themselves whether he or she wants to keep up with that kind of relationship.